trust: one little word for 2015

I said I wasn't going to do it this year...I can't make up my mind; I don't want to confine myself to just one word; I usually forget about it by February anyway; I have too much else to worry about...

...and then it came to me. In the dark of the night (actually the wee hours of the morning, when I tend to wake up anyway, with my mind/heart in gear for the day):

t  r  u  s  t

Actually, I have been 'trusting' for a few years now - albeit sporadically and in varying degrees - in two important areas of my life: Faith and Art. (Relax, family and friends...you all are in the Love area, which is inextricably linked to these two.) This year I am really going to focus on it, pray on it, and reflect upon it on a daily basis.

1.

Trust in the Lord

Fear is useless,

what is needed is trust.

Luke 8:50 and Mark 5:36

(paraphrase)

(and a favourite of my Canadian husband's)

"Fear is useless, what is needed is trust," seems to be a pastoral translation, and while it strays a bit from the literal meaning of the underlying Greek, it does seem to speak to men of our time. I know many people that have this particular translation memorized instead of "Fear not, believe only," without actually owning a copy of the St. Joseph Ed. NAB from whence it comes. People hear it, remember it, and take it to heart. I was shocked when my search for 'fear is useless' in the 'Faith Database' came back with nothing in all of its Bible translations. That is what lead me to this discussion forum. I am glad to know which Bible translation it comes from so that I can continue quoting the phrase with a bit more certainty.   ~ Carson Parker

detail from the piece

'Faith, Hope & Love'

which I made

a few years ago

And believing that art - whatever form it takes - is my Creative Calling, it goes hand-in-hand with Trust in the Lord. So (note to self)...

2.

Trust the Process

There's been a lot written about the creative process, and I have studied it for many years. At some point, pretty much everyone talks about trusting the process...for good reason. Here are a few of my favorites:

The War of Art, by Stephen Pressfield

The Creative Call, by Janice Elsheimer

The Creative Habit, by Twyla Tharp

The Everyday Work of Art, by Eric Booth

The Artist's Way, by Julia Cameron

Walking on Water, by Madeleine L'Engle

Art for God's Sake, by Philip G. Ryken

and anything by Frederick Franck

A quick google search netted many hits such as these:

10 ways to let go of fear and trust the process
Trust the Process: the Creation of Holistic Art
...and a handful of blog posts by artists like me

It was actually Ali Edwards, one of my favorite artists, who first introduced me to the annual One Word concept many years ago. This year I am finally taking her class: One Little Word Project. I'm hoping - trusting - that it will help me follow through this year.

***

Linking up with

Friday Finds

Ali Edwards

mary's boy child

Long time ago in Bethlehem

So the Holy Bible say

Mary's boy child, Jesus Christ

Was born on Christmas day.

Hark, now hear the angels sing

A new King born today

And man will live forever more

Because of Christmas day.

music and lyrics

by

Jester Hairston

sung

by

Harry Belefonte

***

LR preset: kk_litely

Textures: kk_waterfront30 and kk_myrtle

Drawing: newborn Fen (from my own photo files that day)

Linking up with

Be Still 52 (week 29)

Texture Tuesday

***

Merry Christmas!

humble of heart

There's something about

dried flowers

that speaks

to me

so

eloquently

of

life.

LR preset: kk_pause
Textures: kk_anne and kk_bamboo

I gathered several of these
'daisy heads'
from my garden
this fall.
I found them
to be
infinitely more
captivating
than their
showy summertime
incarnation,
the black-eyed susan

I set up
this little still life
and captured it
with my iPhone 5
just so I could
experiment
with some apps.

as seen on Instagram

It is a mystery that unless unless the seed falls to the ground and unless it dies, it remains alone. I realize that there are many things in me that must die before He can live: my pride, my ambition, my impatience, my anger. The difficulty in loving my neighbor, or listening to the problems of another. There is much that I must die to. But unless these things are conquered, He cannot live in me.

 Mother Angelica

***

Linking up with

Friday Finds

pink ribbon warrior: a still-life portrait

war·rior

noun, often attributive

\ˈwȯr-yər, ˈwȯr-ē-ər, ˈwär-ē- also ˈwär-yər\

a person engaged in some struggle or conflict 

 This week's Be Still 52 challenge:

create a

'still-life family portrait'

Today I pay tribute to

my late sister

Lissa

a

'pink ribbon warrior'

in the truest sense.

Back in 1995, when Lissa was diagnosed at age 40 with Stage 2 breast cancer

I embroidered this pink sun hat for her to wear.

Lissa endured surgery, chemotherapy and radiation.

She won her battle with breast cancer.

Two years later

she succumbed to Leukemia -

a result of her chemotherapy treatment.

She won the battle

but lost the war.

I still have her day planner

with her last entries from 1997

in her own handwriting.

***

I still pray for understanding 17 years later, asking God the unanswerable question: Why? Why, dear Lord, did you take this young, brilliant scientist in the prime of her life, who obviously had so much more to give? (Lissa earned a PhD in Anatomy, had herself done cancer research at the Dana Farber Cancer Institute before discovering her true calling as a teacher: of anatomy to medical and dental students, then biology to community college students.) Why did the very science that she loved fail her? For what purpose?

While not exactly getting an answer to this prayer, I have come to be at peace with it. You see, in 2006, I was diagnosed with Stage 0 LCIS. Because of my sister's medical history, I got a 'front row seat': extra-close scrutiny from that point forward, including treatment from Lissa's own oncologist, a simple biopsy, plus five years of hormone therapy, and continued vigilance with yearly mammograms. I've been free and clear for eight years. Easy.

Last month my annual routine mammogram revealed Stage 0 DCIS. You might say things are dialed up a notch this time. This time I was tested for the BRCA gene (negative, thank God), and my MRI was clean. It was recommended that I meet with a plastic surgeon 'so I could make an informed decision' (if you know what I mean...YIKES!). Well, we finally decided on a simple lumpectomy, which is scheduled for early next week. My doctor says I might not need radiation...just more hormone therapy and mammograms every six months for awhile...because we caught it early. Easy...again.

In no way do I consider myself a 'pink ribbon warrior.' My path has been easy because Lissa's was not. If not for her diagnosis in 1995, I myself might not have been as vigilant with yearly mammograms - which have since twice averted a much more serious diagnosis later on.

Lissa was both a pragmatic scientist and a devout Catholic. I firmly believe that she would see the good in this for her little sister - from both perspectives.

***

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,

who have been called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:28

"Notice that the verse doesn’t say God causes evil and suffering, just that he promises to cause good to emerge. And notice that the verse doesn’t say we all will see immediately or even in this life how God has caused good to emerge from a bad circumstance. Remember, we only see things dimly in this world. And notice that God doesn’t make this promise to everyone. He makes the solemn pledge that he will take the bad circumstances that befall us and cause good to emerge if we’re committed to following Him."
Lee Strobel - Why Does God Allow Tragedy and Suffering?

Notes:

CAMERA

Canon EOS 6D

Tamron SP 24-70 f/2.8 lens

Manual Mode

Aperture range: f/5.0 to 6.3

Early morning 

in my

basement studio

with Lillian.

I kept her laser-light cat toy handy

'cause she just seems to know

when I'm ready to

press the shutter button.

Both hand-held and flash

were out of the question

with the available lighting
and subtle shadow-play I wanted,

so I improvised

to get a vertical shot from ground level.

Resting the lens on fabric

probably interfered with its focusing function:

out of over 30 shots,

only one was 'tack sharp'

even though I used the

10 second shutter delay. 

After that first photo session

hauling out the tripod

suddenly seemed to be

not such a bother!

LIGHTROOM

I am still working my way through

Kim's 31 Days of Lightroom class,

especially Custom Layouts

and Snapshots

at my own pace.

I love auditioning and fine-tuning

presets...I finally settled on

kk_breathe

for all photos.

PHOTOSHOP

Just this texturizing:

***

Linking up with

Be Still 52 (Week 17)

Texture Tuesday

good friday: why focus on the cross?

It's somewhat Pollyannish to say, "Christianity is just about the Resurrection, and not the Cross." To say that is to deny the gritty evil in the world. But once you get past childhood and start reading serious books and watching more sophisticated films, you find people desperately wrestling with evil. That's what any serious novel, film, or play is about. Just look at any of Shakespeare's plays--there's always someone engaging profound evil. Therefore, it doesn't make sense to say, "Let's not focus on the Cross; it's too sad, too dark, too evil." 

Pressing the issue theologically, what is the Cross? It's God journey into God-forsakenness. God enters into human dysfunction in all of its forms. In the Passion narratives you have cruelty, violence, hatred, injustice, stupidity--all of human dysfunction is on display. And Jesus enters into that, thereby redeeming it. 

The Church fathers liked to say, "What has not been assumed has not been saved." Jesus assumes the human condition in all of its dysfunction, going all the way down, so to say. And it's only for that reason he can bring us all the way up. 

The Resurrection without the Cross is superficial, just as the Cross without the Resurrection is despair. It's the play between the two that matters. 

~ Father Robert Barron

http://www.lentreflections.com/why-focus-on-the-cross/

I made this little piece awhile back, and it hangs next to our front door. Symbolism abounds:

• the color red = the blood of Christ
• dried rosebuds = the five petals of the rose symbolic of the five wounds of Christ - enclosed beneath the crucified Christ (a vintage remnant, sans cross, from an ebay lot of religious medals)
• which I nailed to the wooden support = the cross itself
• (freshwater) pearl - symbolic of Godly wisdom

I assembled it all on the back side of a small stretched canvas (4x5"), which I painted and distressed, then added mica, fiber and metal.

***

For God so loved the world

that he gave his only begotten Son

that whomsoever believes in him

shall not perish

but have everlasting life.

***

Linking up with

Friday Finds

waiting for salvation

I have waited for Thy salvation O Lord.

Genesis 49:18

***

Here's a little mixed media still life I made - an assignment for The Thread That Weaves, an online class I am taking with Roxanne Evans Stout. I am excited to be getting my hands dirty again and playing with all sorts of possibilities. Just can't settle down and stick to one thing I guess.

The theme of my class project is Revelation. Here's what I emailed to Roxanne last week:

Hi Roxanne,

I am absorbing all your videos and images, letting it soak in. Notice I didn't say "hard at work." I have learned to let stuff simmer and percolate and evolve. Took years and sometimes I revert to old ways, but here I am.

I just knew your class would be a catalyst for discovery...and I'm right. There is so much going on inside my mind, heart, and soul. A bit of Artistic ADD in me LOL. So beware! Might be a bit of real ADD says my dr.
I don't think or act linearly but often in a web of tangents. :)

My theme is Revelation...in the Catholic, biblical sense...we're at the end/beginning of the liturgical calendar year at this late autumn/early winter season. It always feels a certain way this time of year.

I've collected some revelation quotes and passages that speak to me and periodically review them. I'm not very eloquent.

I've built my base book and am having fun compiling a still life collection of stuff to photograph. Love doing this...makes me be patient and persistent.

Studying wabi sabi lately...it has long attracted me, but for years I have done controlled stuff...mainly quilt and embroidery. Dropped that long held passion about 10 yrs ago, burnt out designing and teaching. Rediscovering my love for stitchery, but can't go back to the way I was. Life has changed me I guess. It's all good.

Creating in fits and starts, early mornings before work. The time limitation due to returning to work full time after years at home with kids is really good for me.

Pinterest has been a great way to collect my thoughts and dreams.

***

So I started with these berries,

which I photographed and collected awhile back.

I found one sprig that appeared heart-shaped to me

(a Sacred Heart icon maybe?).

I grabbed a seasonal page from this old devotional

and layered it with some lace

and a scrap of cardboard

onto this old movie tin lid

and a china saucer (resembles a Eucharistic host?)

I'm liking the circle imagery...Alpha and Omega

and set it all up for photography.

Here's the original photo...

...which I edited in Lightroom,

including one of Kim's LR presets: kk_likeadream.

Then into Photoshop

for some texture play:

(note the unused/invisible clone layer - I experimented with

'enhancing' the heart-shape by filling in with cloned berries,

but realized I was being over-controlling...not in keeping with

my new-found passion for Wabi Sabi-ness).

I was planning to use the image in my little book, which is the class project, but it would need to be quite small - too small to see the details. So here it sits in my studio, unsure of its fate.

***

An InLinkz Link-up

Linking up with

Texture Tuesday

Vintage Fest

show & share: see clearly

I made this assemblage for Bob for Christmas a couple years ago, and it hangs on a wall in our dining room in a spot where I can visit it every day. I treasure it dearly for both the emotions and the memories it evokes.

I gathered a few precious souvenirs of our 2007 trip to the UK (rocks, sea shells, a piece of driftwood, a bit of dried heather - all gathered on the coast of Ireland) and combined them with some vintage lace, buttons and trim, and a bit of Gaelic text I found on the internet. The vintage photo mat I scanned from one of Rebecca Sower's photo art pieces, whose mixed media art inspired this piece. BTW, I have been inspired by the work of this amazing artist for years. And it's not just her art, it's the way she truly lives her faith, honoring the Lord in everything she does.

I started with an 8x10 canvas I bought at Michael's. I distressed the wood a bit, then applied some Golden molding paste with a palette knife. Once it was dry I sanded it, then began adding layers of liquid acrylic paint - rubbing, scrubbing, sanding the surface until it looked like driftwood. I painted the canvas in the same way, leaning more toward the wonderful faded aqua tones I remembered from the little seaside town where I took the photo. I did a bit of editing in Photoshop Elements to give the photo a dreamy, misty feel.

I assembled everything within the wooden frame (this makes a nice shadow box) and enclosed it with a piece of glass. Then I wrapped some annealed wire around it all to hold it together. I did use some strong glue (hidden under the driftwood) to keep it from slipping.

***

This layout is from the scrapbook I made to commemorate our trip. Waterville - located on the west coast of Ireland - is the one place Bob continues to mention as the place he would like to return to...

The journaling is in Bob's own words:

I would have been content to spend

the entire 24 days here...

walking the shoreline

and counting the waves.

***

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veni spiritus sanctus

Come Holy Spirit

(Latin translation)

Sometimes I'm not quite sure what I will end up with when I start the creative process, but here's how I got there on this little bit of photo art:

1. For some unknown reason I've been quietly humming this old hymn for the past few days:

I don't know quite how or why it started. I figured that it must be some sort of inspiration, and I'd best see where it took me.

2. Then there's the handful of autumn leaves I collected impulsively the other morning on the way home from the gym. (I was feeling a bit sad, watching the brilliant colors slowly fade away a day at a time.) I wasn't sure just what I would do with them, but I brought them home anyway.

iPhone 5

photos SOOC

Pro Camera app

3. Add to that my current reading list:

• Walking on Water: Reflections on Faith and Art:  by Madeleine L'Engle
• The Creative Call: an Artist's Response to the Way of the Spirit by Janice Elsheimer
• Lumen Fidei ('Light of Faith') the first encyclical by Pope Francis (this was actually the centerpiece of a wonderful three-night retreat we attended this week at our church)

4. And I've been wanting to get my hands on my 'big' camera, and just play around with it, so I assembled a simple little still life and shot a few versions. (Not to worry, Dr. J...I put the camera on a tripod, 'cause it's still too heavy for me to be lugging it around.)

Original photo SOOC

Canon EOS 6D

Canon EF 28-135mm lens

ISO 400 75mm f/5.0  0.3 sec.

5. And since I enjoy creative photo editing as much as photography, I jumped right into Lightroom and Photoshop. I also pulled out this wonderful book: Art Beyond the Lens, by Sarah Gardner, who has developed her own unique approach to the process.

Here's the same image, with a little play-by-play...

I've been playing around with this for three days now, and here is the second and final version. After some extensive editing/playing in Lightroom, I headed over to Photoshop, where:

1. I applied Kim Klassen's kk_booklight (Overlay blend mode 64%) and de-saturated that layer a bit.
2. I lightened and softened things up a bit with Kim's new kk_2110 (Soft Light blend mode 58%)
3. Then two of Sarah Gardner's textures: BEYOND_stormrain (Soft Light blend mode 31%) and BONUS_Glaze1 (Multiply blend mode 38%).
4. In the midst of all that is my text, in two layers (Color Burn blend mode 80%; then duplicated and changed to Multiply blend mode 47%). Font: Mutlu

***

Linking up with:

Texture Tuesday

Friday Finds

show & share: pride & humility

a page from my art journal

always a good place

to experiment with assorted methods and media

and to think 'out loud'...

***

acrylic paint

gesso

paper collage

self-portrait photo

pen & ink

Caran d'ache watersoluble crayons

machine stitching

***

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