trust: one little word for 2015

I said I wasn't going to do it this year...I can't make up my mind; I don't want to confine myself to just one word; I usually forget about it by February anyway; I have too much else to worry about...

...and then it came to me. In the dark of the night (actually the wee hours of the morning, when I tend to wake up anyway, with my mind/heart in gear for the day):

t  r  u  s  t

Actually, I have been 'trusting' for a few years now - albeit sporadically and in varying degrees - in two important areas of my life: Faith and Art. (Relax, family and friends...you all are in the Love area, which is inextricably linked to these two.) This year I am really going to focus on it, pray on it, and reflect upon it on a daily basis.

1.

Trust in the Lord

Fear is useless,

what is needed is trust.

Luke 8:50 and Mark 5:36

(paraphrase)

(and a favourite of my Canadian husband's)

"Fear is useless, what is needed is trust," seems to be a pastoral translation, and while it strays a bit from the literal meaning of the underlying Greek, it does seem to speak to men of our time. I know many people that have this particular translation memorized instead of "Fear not, believe only," without actually owning a copy of the St. Joseph Ed. NAB from whence it comes. People hear it, remember it, and take it to heart. I was shocked when my search for 'fear is useless' in the 'Faith Database' came back with nothing in all of its Bible translations. That is what lead me to this discussion forum. I am glad to know which Bible translation it comes from so that I can continue quoting the phrase with a bit more certainty.   ~ Carson Parker

detail from the piece

'Faith, Hope & Love'

which I made

a few years ago

And believing that art - whatever form it takes - is my Creative Calling, it goes hand-in-hand with Trust in the Lord. So (note to self)...

2.

Trust the Process

There's been a lot written about the creative process, and I have studied it for many years. At some point, pretty much everyone talks about trusting the process...for good reason. Here are a few of my favorites:

The War of Art, by Stephen Pressfield

The Creative Call, by Janice Elsheimer

The Creative Habit, by Twyla Tharp

The Everyday Work of Art, by Eric Booth

The Artist's Way, by Julia Cameron

Walking on Water, by Madeleine L'Engle

Art for God's Sake, by Philip G. Ryken

and anything by Frederick Franck

A quick google search netted many hits such as these:

10 ways to let go of fear and trust the process
Trust the Process: the Creation of Holistic Art
...and a handful of blog posts by artists like me

It was actually Ali Edwards, one of my favorite artists, who first introduced me to the annual One Word concept many years ago. This year I am finally taking her class: One Little Word Project. I'm hoping - trusting - that it will help me follow through this year.

***

Linking up with

Friday Finds

Ali Edwards

in this place

...and I knew it not.

Genesis 28:16 

Sometimes it is hard to believe

that God is

present

in our lives,

especially

in

trying times.

If He seems distant

we have only to

reach out

to

Him.

I remind myself of this on a regular basis.

***

LR preset: darkmood

Textures: kk1 and kk-magic0916

Linking up with

Be Still 52 (week 27)

My Still Sunday (via Instagram)

Texture Tuesday

humble of heart

There's something about

dried flowers

that speaks

to me

so

eloquently

of

life.

LR preset: kk_pause
Textures: kk_anne and kk_bamboo

I gathered several of these
'daisy heads'
from my garden
this fall.
I found them
to be
infinitely more
captivating
than their
showy summertime
incarnation,
the black-eyed susan

I set up
this little still life
and captured it
with my iPhone 5
just so I could
experiment
with some apps.

as seen on Instagram

It is a mystery that unless unless the seed falls to the ground and unless it dies, it remains alone. I realize that there are many things in me that must die before He can live: my pride, my ambition, my impatience, my anger. The difficulty in loving my neighbor, or listening to the problems of another. There is much that I must die to. But unless these things are conquered, He cannot live in me.

 Mother Angelica

***

Linking up with

Friday Finds

i'm never really ready for this...

...but after an unusually warm October

(I was just on my bike the other day - in shorts!)

near-zero temperatures

and blizzard-like conditions

are indeed a

shock to the system.

***

Yesterday I watched

out the window

as it began

to snow.

I felt compelled

to draw.

Soon the white stuff

began to collect

on the few remaining leaves

still clinging to

the aspen trees

in our back yard.

As my eyes saw

my hand drew...

and

in my heart

I sensed

their plight.

I felt

their fear.

I knew

how it would end.

***

Early this morning

I felt compelled

to capture

this unfolding drama

with my camera.

It was so cold

I didn't want to risk

damaging condensation

in my 'big' camera,

so I made a few quick captures

with my iPhone 5.

Version 1

Editing done on my iPad

with the following apps:

LEONARDO - adjust exposure, contrast, brightness

PHOTOGRID- create layout

STACKABLES - add textures:

Winter Frost (Multiply 20%)

Glacial Ice (Color 25%)

Bleached (Soft Light 75%)

Worn Canvas (Hard Light 25%)

Version 2

Editing done on my iMac with

LIGHTROOM (preset: kk_truecolor)

and

PHOTOSHOP

The 'platinum' Gradient Map adjustment layer

(Lighten Blend Mode 32%)

toned down the bright

yellows and greens

just a bit.

***

For everything there is a season

and a time for every matter

under heaven.

Ecclesiastes 3:1

***

Linking up with

Friday Finds

Texture Tuesday

Thank you Roxi and Julie
for getting me hooked

with your

30 Day Scrap with Apps Challenge.

This is seriously

too much fun!

pink ribbon warrior: a still-life portrait

war·rior

noun, often attributive

\ˈwȯr-yər, ˈwȯr-ē-ər, ˈwär-ē- also ˈwär-yər\

a person engaged in some struggle or conflict 

 This week's Be Still 52 challenge:

create a

'still-life family portrait'

Today I pay tribute to

my late sister

Lissa

a

'pink ribbon warrior'

in the truest sense.

Back in 1995, when Lissa was diagnosed at age 40 with Stage 2 breast cancer

I embroidered this pink sun hat for her to wear.

Lissa endured surgery, chemotherapy and radiation.

She won her battle with breast cancer.

Two years later

she succumbed to Leukemia -

a result of her chemotherapy treatment.

She won the battle

but lost the war.

I still have her day planner

with her last entries from 1997

in her own handwriting.

***

I still pray for understanding 17 years later, asking God the unanswerable question: Why? Why, dear Lord, did you take this young, brilliant scientist in the prime of her life, who obviously had so much more to give? (Lissa earned a PhD in Anatomy, had herself done cancer research at the Dana Farber Cancer Institute before discovering her true calling as a teacher: of anatomy to medical and dental students, then biology to community college students.) Why did the very science that she loved fail her? For what purpose?

While not exactly getting an answer to this prayer, I have come to be at peace with it. You see, in 2006, I was diagnosed with Stage 0 LCIS. Because of my sister's medical history, I got a 'front row seat': extra-close scrutiny from that point forward, including treatment from Lissa's own oncologist, a simple biopsy, plus five years of hormone therapy, and continued vigilance with yearly mammograms. I've been free and clear for eight years. Easy.

Last month my annual routine mammogram revealed Stage 0 DCIS. You might say things are dialed up a notch this time. This time I was tested for the BRCA gene (negative, thank God), and my MRI was clean. It was recommended that I meet with a plastic surgeon 'so I could make an informed decision' (if you know what I mean...YIKES!). Well, we finally decided on a simple lumpectomy, which is scheduled for early next week. My doctor says I might not need radiation...just more hormone therapy and mammograms every six months for awhile...because we caught it early. Easy...again.

In no way do I consider myself a 'pink ribbon warrior.' My path has been easy because Lissa's was not. If not for her diagnosis in 1995, I myself might not have been as vigilant with yearly mammograms - which have since twice averted a much more serious diagnosis later on.

Lissa was both a pragmatic scientist and a devout Catholic. I firmly believe that she would see the good in this for her little sister - from both perspectives.

***

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,

who have been called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:28

"Notice that the verse doesn’t say God causes evil and suffering, just that he promises to cause good to emerge. And notice that the verse doesn’t say we all will see immediately or even in this life how God has caused good to emerge from a bad circumstance. Remember, we only see things dimly in this world. And notice that God doesn’t make this promise to everyone. He makes the solemn pledge that he will take the bad circumstances that befall us and cause good to emerge if we’re committed to following Him."
Lee Strobel - Why Does God Allow Tragedy and Suffering?

Notes:

CAMERA

Canon EOS 6D

Tamron SP 24-70 f/2.8 lens

Manual Mode

Aperture range: f/5.0 to 6.3

Early morning 

in my

basement studio

with Lillian.

I kept her laser-light cat toy handy

'cause she just seems to know

when I'm ready to

press the shutter button.

Both hand-held and flash

were out of the question

with the available lighting
and subtle shadow-play I wanted,

so I improvised

to get a vertical shot from ground level.

Resting the lens on fabric

probably interfered with its focusing function:

out of over 30 shots,

only one was 'tack sharp'

even though I used the

10 second shutter delay. 

After that first photo session

hauling out the tripod

suddenly seemed to be

not such a bother!

LIGHTROOM

I am still working my way through

Kim's 31 Days of Lightroom class,

especially Custom Layouts

and Snapshots

at my own pace.

I love auditioning and fine-tuning

presets...I finally settled on

kk_breathe

for all photos.

PHOTOSHOP

Just this texturizing:

***

Linking up with

Be Still 52 (Week 17)

Texture Tuesday

a still moment: after the rain

It's amazing what you can find
when you step outside
and wander around
your yard
after
a
summer rain.

 I ended up 'rescuing' this sweet aspen leaf

from our driveway

so I could draw it later

(and I couldn't bear the thought

of backing over it

with my van)

 standing in the shelter

of a giant old blue spruce

looking out

toward the

late afternoon light

I truly do love

our aspens...

a beauty both

majestic

and

delicate

***

Notes:

CAMERA

Canon EOS 6D

Tamron SP 24-70 f/2.8 lens

Manual Mode

What better way to practice

focus and depth of field techniques

than with

tiny raindrops?

LIGHTROOM

Lots of fun

experimenting

with the

Develop Module

Presets (kk_gentle)

Snapshots

and

Print Module

as I follow along

in

Kim's

31 Days of Lightroom

PHOTOSHOP

Yeah, I know it would have been simpler

to mask off the textures

with a wider brush,

but I really wanted to emphasize

the water drops

***

Let My teaching fall like rain

and My words descend like dew,

like showers on new grass,

like abundant rain

on tender plants.

Deuteronomy 32:2

***

Linking up with
Be Still 52 (Week 15)
Friday Finds
Texture Tuesday

P.S.

If you get a chance, do sign up for

Kim Manley Ort's E-course

Adventures in Seeing

or at the very least

subscribe to her blog.

zen seeing part 2

I so enjoyed the
seeing/drawing/photographing process

a couple weeks ago,

I thought I'd

revisit it.

It was pure delight

creating these images

...

from conception

(seeing these amazing dandelions

at the side of the road)

thru composing,

studying,

drawing,

photographing,

to post-processing.

Photography, like drawing, can be a

Right Brain activity;

but it starts with
seeing
- really seeing -  

Check out Kim Manley Ort's post on
photography, drawing, and seeing.
Thank you Kim for
your amazing
blog!

"drawing...the intensifier of firsthand seeing,

as a catalyst of awareness

that makes us independent of our serfdom

to technology."

Frederick Frank

Zen Seeing, Zen Drawing

These few
still quiet hours
with my camera
my pencil and paper
and my computer
- or paintbrush or pliers or needle & thread -
...

this is my idea of

a perfect
Be Still Day
(even if it is only a few hours).

Lillian seems to enjoy it too.

She reminds me to be curious...

...and try new things.

Notes:

LIGHTROOM

Recipe:

Scott Kelby's

B&W conversion

from his Lightroom 4 book

then

boost Clarity and Vibrance

plus my own

Subtle Sepia Split Tone

PHOTOSHOP

textured with two layers of

kk_pinitonly4

Soft Light 28%

Vivid Light 15%

***

"I created beauty to declare the existence of My holy Being....to proclaim My Presence in the world. Most people rush past these proclamations without giving them a second thought...Even before you knew Me personally, you responded to My creation with wonder. This is a gift, and it carries responsibility with it. Declare My glorious Being to the world."

excerpt from
July 30 reading

from

Jesus Calling

by

Sarah Young

***

Linking up with

Friday Finds

Be Still 52

(Week 11)

Texture Tuesday

Adventures in Seeing

good friday: why focus on the cross?

It's somewhat Pollyannish to say, "Christianity is just about the Resurrection, and not the Cross." To say that is to deny the gritty evil in the world. But once you get past childhood and start reading serious books and watching more sophisticated films, you find people desperately wrestling with evil. That's what any serious novel, film, or play is about. Just look at any of Shakespeare's plays--there's always someone engaging profound evil. Therefore, it doesn't make sense to say, "Let's not focus on the Cross; it's too sad, too dark, too evil." 

Pressing the issue theologically, what is the Cross? It's God journey into God-forsakenness. God enters into human dysfunction in all of its forms. In the Passion narratives you have cruelty, violence, hatred, injustice, stupidity--all of human dysfunction is on display. And Jesus enters into that, thereby redeeming it. 

The Church fathers liked to say, "What has not been assumed has not been saved." Jesus assumes the human condition in all of its dysfunction, going all the way down, so to say. And it's only for that reason he can bring us all the way up. 

The Resurrection without the Cross is superficial, just as the Cross without the Resurrection is despair. It's the play between the two that matters. 

~ Father Robert Barron

http://www.lentreflections.com/why-focus-on-the-cross/

I made this little piece awhile back, and it hangs next to our front door. Symbolism abounds:

• the color red = the blood of Christ
• dried rosebuds = the five petals of the rose symbolic of the five wounds of Christ - enclosed beneath the crucified Christ (a vintage remnant, sans cross, from an ebay lot of religious medals)
• which I nailed to the wooden support = the cross itself
• (freshwater) pearl - symbolic of Godly wisdom

I assembled it all on the back side of a small stretched canvas (4x5"), which I painted and distressed, then added mica, fiber and metal.

***

For God so loved the world

that he gave his only begotten Son

that whomsoever believes in him

shall not perish

but have everlasting life.

***

Linking up with

Friday Finds

special delivery

It's the same thing every Christmas season: an underlying sense of sadness, gloom, depression in the midst of this 'joyous' season. How many people wander about amidst the trimmings and trappings, 'just not in the Christmas spirit,' merely enduring it all? Aren't we supposed to be feeling 'merry and bright'? Seriously. All this Christmas Cheer seems only to magnify the human condition...the misery, the injustice, the evil of this world.

But it is for all mankind, especially these people, that Christ came into this imperfect world. (And who among us are not one of 'these people'?) And to top it off, we celebrate it at the darkest,  gloomiest time of the year: winter solstice. Ironic, eh? Or maybe not...for didn't Jesus say,

I am the Light of the world;

he who follows Me will not walk in the darkness,

but will have the Light of life.

John 8:12

Linking up with
Texture Tuesday

***

I assembled this little collage as part of an assignment in a wonderful online class with Roxanne Evans Stout: The Thread that Weaves. I didn't really have anything in mind when I created it a couple weeks ago...it just sort of happened.

The other day I scanned it so I could play with it in Photoshop, enhancing it with some of Kim's

lovely textures: kk_1216 and serious magic. Also a bit of fun with Kim's new Vines & Lines brush set.

Thank you both, Roxanne and Kim, for sharing so generously the gift of your creative talent!

***

Wishing you

Peace & Light

at

Christmas